Saturday, June 6, 2009

More Shots...for how long??

Here's a post that might sound like I'm whining, but bare with me. It might also prepare someone going through this because I wasn't prepared. We had the two classes, but I didn't think it was going to be like it is.

So I've started the Progesterone shots to help my body be the best it can trying to hold on to those embryos. I get one shot every night, but the kicker is I have to keep getting the shot for about 4 to 6 weeks. Oh my goodness!! This is going to be crazy...

My poor butt is bruised and so sore. I feel like I had someone take a bat to my lower back and beat a few times. For anyone going through this once or multiple times - I have so much respect for you. These shots leave your butt soooooo sore and bruised. In addition, it gets kind of alien like from the oil. Since the medication is in oil, it leaves a goose egg at the injection site and you have to rub the oil into the muscle. Keep in mind that I have to rub this oil bump on top of other injections and bruising.

This is kind of gross, but I just want to do what I can to prepare others for it and give a little advice. I just got a heating pad today, and I'm hoping that it will relieve some of the pain after the shot. I also try to ice the injection area before the shot to see if that will help, but it hasn't worked so well so far.

One of the worst things is if the injection hit a bad spot and Chris has to re-insert the needle. Ugh....I feel so bad because I'm in pain and Chris doesn't want to hurt me. It's a double whammy. But we're getting through it.

So here's to my bruised and sore butt!!

Take care everyone! Sticky thoughts...

Transfer Day - May 26th

This has been quite the ride so far. I can't believe it was already time for the Transfer!!

On Sunday, the day after retrieval, we were told we would get a call from the lab telling us how well the little eggs and swimmers were doing. I could barely sleep on Saturday night because I was scared to receive bad news. What if none of them matured?? I was going to be devasted. We got good news. The call came at about 8 am, and the embryologist said of the 7 eggs:
  • 5 matured
  • Only 2 progressed and were viable.

ONLY 2!! I know that is really great news, but also means that there wouldn't be any eggs to freeze for another try if we could ever afford to do this again down the road. I know I sound kind of negative, but this was a free IVF cycle for us. It is an incredible and best prize we could ever have, and we had mentally prepared ourselves before we won the prize that we wouldn't be able to afford to have biological children. Since IVF is not supported by health insurance in Minnesota, and it is incredibly costly. Friends of ours spent $80,000 on IVF cycles. Crazy!! and leaves me speechless. So please if I have any negativity coming through on this blog it's because it was and is a very scary process for me, but I'm always very thankful to be going through it.

So now we waited until Tuesday, May 26th for the transfer. A comforting feeling during the wait was that we had 2 fertilized emryos (our babies) hanging out in a petri dish waiting for me. So emotional!! Can you believe technology??

In the meantime, I had to start taking Progesterone shots on Sunday night. Progesterone is within oil and injected in the butt :) Time for the butt shots!! Bring on the big needles. Now these needles are at about 2 inches long, or somewhat (you get the picture - they are long). My sister gets faint when she looks at them :) Plus I've already filled up a needle disposal so now we've moved onto the Tide bottle. Lots of needles.

Now this first night with shots was kind of crazy. Chris was prepping the needle, but this was more difficult than the other shots. The oil is harder to pull back into the needle. So if it's hard to get into the needle, just think about how hard it is to inject into the butt muscle....just to prepare you. For these shots, they are injected in my butt about 4 inches from the top of my butt crack. So the upper butt area. Here it goes...we were as ready as we would ever be. Kinda laughing to calm ourselves down. So in the needle went - awesome step 1 done - and now Chris had to pull back and check for blood before injecting - awesome step 2 done - and now time to inject. This was painful because it was so hard to inject and Chris has to push so hard. But he did very well. Step 3 done :) Time to remove the needle. Step 4 done!! But not done yet :)....All of a sudden I started spurting blood and Chris was catching it and trying to give it back to me. It was kind of humorous, but I was getting weezy. I looked back and all I saw was blood. Oh boy...they didn't warn us about this during injection training :)

Chris right away called the emergency line. The doctor on call said he probably went through a vein on entry and when he removed the needle let the blood pour out. So we were good...

I'll chat more about these shots...more posts to come :)

Okay, now on to the good stuff = Transfer.

This was a crazy day! I was kind of ridiculous and decided to work at home on Monday night, and went to work Tuesday morning for a breif hour to try and get some stuff done before I was to be on bed rest. What a mistake!!! I had no idea how stressful that was going to be! I left there shaking and mad at myself for even trying to do a favor that backfired in my face. Now my nerves were extremely high and I was terrified for the transfer. I wanted everything to work perfectly. Well I got out of the office late and was rushing home. Chris calmed me down and I was better. I made it home just in time to take my valium and head to the hospital . This was my first time taking valium :) It definitely helped me relax. I got to the hospital and I was feeling very relaxed, but it wore off way too quickly. It was completely gone before the Transfer actually took place, but the doctor was running behind by about 20 minutes. At least I was calmer than I was earlier.

1:00 pm
Chris and I met the embryologists and our embryos!! This was so awesome. The lab was small but such a great experience. Chris and I were able to look at our embryos under the microscope. Just amazing amazing amazing!! I can't say that enough.

Next, we got ready for the transfer. The lab is connected to the room the transfer takes place. So I got ready in the "chair". Remember the chair?? :) The nurses and doctors entered the room and went through the procedure. Please keep in mind that I have a full bladder during this!!

  • First, the doctor inserts the speculum. (Never comfortable - especially with a full bladder)
  • Next, the nurse has an ultrasound right over my bladder and uterus applying a lot of pressure so the doctor can insert the catheter.
  • The doctor has to try various catheters to see which works best with my uterus and length of my uterus. (I still have a full bladder and the nurse is now pushing harder)
  • Chris looked at my face and could tell I was uncomfortable, but I said I was fine fine fine. (I really wanted to tell him to focus on the screen!!)
  • When the doctor was ready, he notified the lab and the sliding door opened. Now my legs are wide open to the lab just saying hello :) Kinda funny moment...
  • The embryologist gave the doctor the petri dish (our babies :) ) and inserted them through the catheter and into my uterus. Chris was able to see them go into my uterus on the ultrasound. That was really cool!
  • Next the embryologist had to examine the catheter to make sure the embryos didn't stick to it. We were good to go he said and the sliding door closed.

The transfer was accomplished and I didn't pee! I thought I might have because there was some liquid dripping...I'll stop there. Everyone left the room, and we had to chill out in the room for about 15 minutes thinking sticky thoughts. Then, we were ready to go home. Now, it was time for bed rest for a couple days. Voila!! Isn't that a crazy process :)

Time to wait!! Thinking sticky thoughts :)

Retrieval Day - May 23rd

It's finally the day! Time to get those eggs :) Here's our play by play:

6:00 am
Wake up and walk the dogs. Daily routine, but super anxious, nervous, and scared! I think I was more scared than I thought I would be.

7:30 am
We arrived at the doctor's office. Time for the anesthesia and a visit with the doctor. Chris and I had some fun taking pictures while we were getting ready for the retrieval. Those hospital gowns and lights are so flattering. I'll be sure to post some pictures. We had a different anesthetist than before, and she was awesome. Our doctor stopped by for a quick visit. It was kind of sad to hear that we didn't have an average amount of follicles. I kind of felt like a failure - but I'm sure again that my mind wasn't stable. I like to be an overachiever and at that moment I felt like I had underachieved. If only I could've been thinking like a sane person and been happy to have follicles. IVF is such an intense process and I was so scared of anything going wrong.

8:30 am
Time for the retrieval. Thank goodness I would be taking a super nap because I was so scared. We entered the room and I sat in the funky chair (this chair is like a crazy lazy boy). The chair end at my mid-butt and has the large padded thigh rests that strap your legs in. It's totally funky. I got the oxygen in my nose and the drugs started. I was out within seconds. So the rest of the retrieval is through my husband's eyes.

During the classes we got to see pictures of the instruments that would be used. It was crazy. So basically the doctor has to insert the ultrasound probe and the ovary egg sucker (at least that's what I'm going to call it) and there might have been more... It's crazy how much stuff they can stuff up there and still get the job done :) The ovary egg sucker is a large needle that goes through the vaginal wall to the ovary. The needle pokes the follical and sucks out the egg(s) that are within that follicle. Who thinks of these things??

Have you ever seen lipo suction on TV? Well...My husband's jaw fell and his face was kind of stunned when they started the process. The doctor went to town on my ovaries I guess. It looked like he was just jamming on my ovaries and Chris was expecting the process to be delicate. Crazy! Another moment that it would've been interesting to be a fly on the wall. But this makes sense on why I felt like I did after the procedure.

10:00
I started waking up. I was so happy to see Chris and the nurse, but I was in so much pain. The doctor asked me what pain I was in from 1 to 10 (10 being the worst). I guess I told them about 5 to 6 right away, but I don't remember that. I wanted to ask them "What do you want me to say?" I was hurting like someone was squeezing everything they could out of my ovaries. So I was modest and said a 7 when they asked again. Now it was time for Chris's duty - time to get the swimmers. He had to leave me, which made me feel sad because I didn't want to be alone. I had just heard the results of the retrieval. The doctor said they got 7 eggs. 7 EGGS!!! I should be happy, but I wasn't. Before the procedure, the doctor said that they like to have at least 12 eggs on average. Again I felt like a failure! Bring on the tears...

So now I was in a room by myself just thinking like I did something wrong and I was scared and in pain. But when Chris was on his way out he made us all laugh. I told him Good luck and I would see him in a little bit. Chris responded and said "Don't worry hunny, you know me, I'll only be a minute". He had all the nurses laughing and even the doctor. I guess the doctor doesn't laugh like that very often so it was a good moment and helped cheer me up.

Occasionaly, someone would come in the room to check my status and the tears would start again and they would stay by my side to help assure me that everything was going to be okay. They've had less eggs and everything turn out successful. Chris was back and helped calm me down as well. That was great and exactly what I needed. Unfortunately, the pain wasn't getting better, but it was time to go home.

It's time for another suggestion for anyone going through this: The nurse gave me the choice of a thin or thick pad as we were getting ready to go home. I chose the thin pad because my last procedure I didn't bleed that much. Oh was I way wrong this time. Suggestion to any ladies that have to go through this - CHOOSE THE LARGE PAD. By the time I got to the elevator, I felt like a coffee mug of blood had just been poured right out of me. Luckily I had black sweat pants on... ISHDA!!

So we made it home and I went right to bed waiting for the pain to go away. My parents came down as well and that was great to have so much support. I was pretty sore for the rest of the day and kind of laid around. I was able to go out dinner, but that was about it. By Sunday afternoon, I was able to walk around and go to the dog park with my girls. My mom and sister came with to chase after the dogs if need be since I could basically only be at a stroll pace :)

Now that it was Sunday, time to start another round of shots!! SHOTS!!!! I'll talk about these again in my post about Progesterone :)

Take care everyone!!

Doctor Visits and more Doctor Visits...

Hi again,

Let's chat about doctor visits during IVF.

IVF is a very fragile and timely process so I totally understand the importance of the doctor visits. I guess I just wasn't ready for the number of visits we had. With school and work weighing really heavily on me in May, the doctor appointments just added that much more. At the beginning the visits were great because they were pretty interesting, but the more and more we had them I guess I was getting nervous things weren't going according to plan. But my mind wasn't completely stable either.

Each doctor's appointment starts with a vaginal ultrasound (I've been probed so many times I think I've lost track :) ) to check on the harvesting progress - ovaries and endometrium lining. This was really cool! At the beginning we had a doctor visit about twice to three times a week. So it was fun to look on the monitor and see how many follicles were developing and how big they were getting from week to week. After the ultrasound, there was also a blood test to check my estradiol levels. So my arm was pricked pretty good, but the doctors were great. I only started to bruise at the end of the process so I didn't have to look like a druggie for too long :) The blood tests were crucial to check my hormone levels.

After the first couple weeks, things seemed to be going well. They thought I might have about 15 follicles on each ovary. We were still on progress for our tentative retrieval date. But after that it didn't seem to be going as well as they would've hoped. Not all of the follicles developed, and some were overpowering the rest. Our retrieval date was being pushed back after each visit and we had to see the doctor more often. For some reason, which could've been just random, my estradiol levels were lower than wanted and my follicles weren't growing as fast as wanted. So my nerves tended to take over and I was thinking I did something wrong from time to time. The doctor visits turned into every other day (including Sunday mornings :). I thought a Sunday at the doctor's office was kind of funny.

Even though the doctor visits were so frequent, it helped me relax because the doctors and nurses were so awesome. Despite the way things were progressing they made Chris and I feel like we were doing everything perfect and everything will be just fine. That was so awesome and we can't thank them enough for being so supportive. I still feel like I'm walking into Cheers when I get to there because everyone has gotten to know us and they are all so supportive. Plus we tended to make everyone chuckle at least a little bit when we visited.

When it came to the week of the retrieval I was definitely feeling my ovaries. My tummy was hurting as those follicles were growing - which was also awesome! We went to a movie the night before the retrieval and I could barely make it through. Crazy!

Our retrieval date was on May 23rd! Bring on the eggs :)

Shots without a Hangover!

April 29th was the BIG day!! Time to start Harvesting :)

On April 29th I started my injections into my tummy (just a couple inches from my belly button). First, I just want to share the medications I used for IVF:
  • Bravelle
  • Menopur
  • Lupron
  • HCG
  • Progesterone
  • Doxycycline
  • Valium
  • Birth Control

It is kind of a hassle and lots of calling in order to get the medications ordered and through insurance. Since most health insurances do not cover anything with infertility we weren't sure exactly how much of the medications would be covered. So that was kind of nerve racking to not know what kind of bill we would have. In the end after ordering refills, we spent just over $1000 for medications that usually cost between $3000 and $4000. Oh and trying to decide who to order through was another headache. There are so many sources out there, but we just stayed with Caremark through my insurance. They were easy and friendly to deal with.

So we got everything ordered and it was delivered within a day. It arrived in 2 boxes. One of the boxes was 2feet by 3 feet :) Crazy!! The other box had my temperature controlled HCG shot. One shot needed a 1 foot by 1 foot box. Too funny :) So now our spare bedroom looked like a drug room. Needles, Needles, Needles :) I felt official now having a needle disposal container.

On April 29th I gave myself my first injection of Lupron and I continued taking the pill until May 3rd. The morning of the 29th was kind of crazy. Chris and I had some nerves trying to make everything go well and still make it to work on time. So we've had the injection training and thought it was all good. The dogs were kind of anxious too trying to figure out what was going on! The daily routine had been interrupted and it was pretty funny if I was a fly on the wall watching us get the shots taken care of and getting the dogs on their potty walk.

Chris, bless his heart, mixed my drugs and prepared my needles for me every morning! EVERY MORNING!! That was so fantastic. Then, all I had to do was inject myself. The needles for my tummy were about an inch long. So on that first day I got a little squeemish...injected myself and suddenly felt faint. I rushed to the bedroom and made it to the bed before collapsing. Uffduh...I wasn't expecting that. But from there on out, it was a piece of cake.

I started the menopur mixed with bravelle shots 5 days later. So now Chris had to prepare 2 needles every morning. Again bless his heart!! I never once had to mix the drugs, and he was good at it too. So much work! Now taking 2 shots in my tummy :) My tummy did start having some bruising. There were black and blue circles on both sides of my belly button. Not attractive at all, but I know it's for a good cause.

By the middle of May I could start feeling my ovaries getting bigger, but I didn't feel like my mood was getting wacky. Probably because I was way too stressed with school and work to let myself get crazy. Ovaries are usually about the size of almonds, and during harvesting they could grow to be the size of a small apple. So there was some discomfort there. I wasn't able to continue exercising after May 8th. I could still go on walks, but that was about it. It was very important to keep it easy to prevent any damage to my ovaries and tubes. There is a chance that my tubes could twist, and that would require surgery to fix or possibly have permanent damage. So I definitely listened and that meant no more golf or running until at least August :(. I was sad but understood it was for a good cause. I kind of felt like a blob, but as the time went on it became more painful to sometimes sit up or walk.

Since the shots were important to regulate my hormones and follicle production, it was also important to have doctor appointments to monitor the harvesting and blood levels. My next post will describe all the doctor appointments and the time leading up to the retrieval.

Shots and No hangover :)

What is Prescreening?

Hi Everyone!

I'm back and trying to catch up on my blogs. This will probably be an overload :)

I would like to share more about what exactly what is involved in the Prescreening process. I'm just going to start at the beginning again - then I won't lose track.

When Chris and I started trying to have a baby, we learned that doctors really don't want to research your infertility issues until you have been trying for at least a year. Sure, if we were so concerned (or I should say we were really depressed going month to month and being unsuccessful) we could have lied and said we had tried for a year. But that just didn't feel right at all and we are terrible liars. So we rolled with the punches and did our wait and then scheduled the appointment with my OB. In the meantime, let me tell you how handy it is to have a Flexible Spending Account!! Those ovulation tests and pregnancy tests are soooooo expensive over a 12 month period plus, and at least we got them tax free!

Chris and I were trying to be positive through all this and just think that we were doing something wrong. But, it was always in the back of our mind that something was wrong because I had never been on birth control and we never had a pregnancy scare. So now that we had our appointment we started the process. I'm just going to skip ahead to where the journey going through IVF begins. Please see some of my other posts to read about how we got from discover to IVF.

So we got our awesome news in January at the Infertility Conference. I think that has been our best investment to date. I think it should be our little Mastercard commercial.
  • $400 Ovulation and Pregnancy Tests
  • $X Doctor Visits to Discover the Truth
  • $150 To share stories, learn alternative treatments, and receive support at the RESOLVE Infertility Conference
  • Winning a Free IVF Cycle from our clinic at the Conference = PRICELESS!!

I'm probably forgetting some other crucial events, but it's my commercial and I'm constantly editing :)

Okay, moving on...We ended some of the alternative treatments we were in the midst of trying in January and started the IVF process. Prescreening (da ta ta daaaa):

  • Physician Orientation
  • Doctor Consultation (2 hours class)
  • Evaluation (Male and Female Blood Tests to make sure we don't have HIV or STDs (this is kind of weird when you've been with the same person for 13 years, and we had to update our shots)
  • Day 3 Labs (This freaked me out at first, but now not so much)
  • Begin taking Birth Control Pills
  • Nurses Orientation (2 hour class)
  • Psychologist Appointment
  • Injection Training
  • Sonohyterogram
  • Consent Signing and Payment

So that is what Prescreening is :) Uffduh!! Now that I write it all down it reminded me of all those visits. But wait until I get into the actual IVF process (now that was a lot of visits).

The two classes were great, but a lot of information to remember and read. There are 2 classes so that we could have both the Doctor and Nurses perspective - which was awesome. The Day 3 labs are bloodwork and a vaginal ultrasound on day 3 of your period. Sounds gross, but there are so many vaginal ultrasounds I had to have during my period going through this that it's no big deal now. Like I said before that I had never taking birth control pills, so I was so nervous to start. I don't know what it is about the pill, but it just freaked me out. So I started the pill, and that might seem weird. Well, actually studies have shown higher IVF success rates having women use the pill to regulate and rest their ovaries during the IVF process. So while I was the pill I would skip the sugar pills and continue taking the pill to stall my period. This put my ovaries in a resting state before I started the drug treatments to start harvesting. Crazy...huh??

Finally, the injection training and sonohysterogram and consent signing. Since I've already discussed the later 2 I'll tell you a little about the injection training. A nurse works with both Chris and I to teach us how to inject me. I would be giving myself 2 shots a day up to day of transfer and Chris would be giving 1 shot a day after the transfer. We were both kind of scared, but got through it. I think watching the videos got us all worked up, but the nurses and doctors helped us through the whole process. So basically, I'm a human pin cushion and my husband is my drug dealer. :)

So I hope this blog helps describe the prescreening process. Please, as always, let me know if you have questions.